Post #9: Anita is at Manor Care

Hello all,

Well the move happened. They came at 12:30 ysterday to pick Anita up from Premier Heatlhcare and move her to Manor Care which is located in Palm Desert much, much closer to her house. As Mother was leaving Premier, Fritzie was arriving for a visit and helped me remove Mother's things from her room there. Thank you Fritzie!

Manor Care Health Services is located at 74-350 Country Club Drive between Portola and Cook Streets on the north side of the street. Mother has a private room. The phone number for Manor Care is (760) 341-0261. This is a much nicer facility than Premier. Her room is homey with furniture that one might find in a house - e.g. wing chairs, a wood entertainment center, wood nightstand, and wood round table. She looks out on a tree and grass. I have met the resident doctor there and he is a wonderfully sensitive and caring person. So Anita is in very good hands at the moment.

She is definitely in hospice care now which means no food or hydration but she will be provided with oxygen (if and when needed) and pain medications as needed. It is important to watch her for indications of pain. So if any of you happen to be visiting her and notice her grimacing, or groaning, or showing signs of discomfort, please report your observations to the nurse on duty. The doctor stated that they have physical indicators they look for with patients, particularly those who can not speak for themselves, which allows the staff to assess her pain level and to decide the type and amount of pain medication to administer.

As for her condition as of yesterday, the doctor stated that she is partly there and partly not. The part that is not there will never return. She is quiet, her color is still good, she casts sweet looks at those about her. I asked the doctor how long she has left. He stated that every individual differs, but that in general from the date a person stops eating it is approximately three weeks. She has already gone without food since March 5 which is 9 days. Because Mother was in good physical condition before the stroke, except for the cancer which we believe now has returned, it could take longer than three weeks.

Meanwhile, I am working hard this morning on getting the powers-that-be to allow Mother to stay at the facility rather than bring her home. Her insurance company/Family Hospice Care claims that she has to come home after a five-day stay because they have no long-term hospice facility(ies) contracted. But I have discovered that there are such services available here. Odyssey Hospice, which has its own wing attached to Manor Care, has a long-term hospice facility where patients may remain until they pass. To do this, it may be that we have to change Mother's hospice provider. If so, I will make sure it gets done.

I have talked with many of Anita & John's friends and we all agree, as John does as well, that it is a bad idea to bring her home. First, she has herself indicated disinterest in returning home. Second, it is a major disruption and would be devastating and a horror for John. It would turn memories of Anita into a nightmare everytime he walked into her "room." He should not be faced with this.

We have a four-day window to get this done. I will keep you informed.

Melissa